Jerry and I love to walk. Well, me more than him, but he’s catching on. Moving as briskly as possible we generally try to walk five days a week, about 40 minutes at a time. Beside the benefits of losing some pesky pounds while getting in shape, we often get to see beautiful sunrises. One morning this past week, the sky was extraordinary.
Peppered with hundreds of cotton ball-like clouds it was beautiful almost beyond description. I was about to exclaim its loveliness to Jerry when he beat me to the punch saying, “Hey! Look at those clouds. They remind me of the ones on The Simpsons.” In a split instant, I went from marveling at the wonderful picture God had painted across the sky to envisioning the images of Marge, Homer, Bart, Lisa, and Maggie—their theme song then playing in my head.
Men. So very different from women. Some, like feminist and political activist Gloria Steinem, have denied that could be true and have railed against those studying to see if indeed women are from Venus and men are from Mars. But in the end, with all the data from psychological and scientific studies, the findings are, that we are truly distinctive from one another.
Check it out. These are just a few examples.
- A man’s brain is usually 10% larger than a woman’s. But certain brain areas in a woman has more nerve cells.
- In a test designed to study if nonsense words rhymed, men and women performed the same. Imaging results showed that during the test, women used both sides of their brains while men only used one.
- Women can recall lists of words better than a man, but men using different strategies and different parts of their brains can navigate better than women.
- Men take more financial risks than women.
- Women are more likely to resolve day-to-day issues within a relationship while men want to settle the life-changing ones.
- Women ask more questions.
- Men are responsible for three-fourths of interruptions during conversations.
*Bill and Pam Farrel, “Understand How a Woman’s Brain Is Like Spaghetti,” Focus on the Family, Accessed September 28, 2016.
Studies also show that while men compartmentalize everything, women have different strands of thought, constantly and simultaneously intersecting each other at different points.¹ This doesn’t help with communication and many times is the culprit for when it doesn’t succeed. Take for example this possible conversation between a husband, Dan, and his wife, Joan.
Joan gets home and says, “Honey, how was your day? I had a good day today. We just committed to a new educational wing at the university, and I have been asked to oversee the budget. I am so excited that they didn’t rule me out because I am a woman. You know women have been fighting for a place in society for decades, and it is good to see so much progress being made. I think it is neat that you treat the women who work for you with so much respect. Our daughter is so lucky to have you for a dad. Did you remember that Susie has a soccer game tonight? I think it is important we are there because the Johnsons are going to be there, and I really want you to meet them. Susie and Bethany are getting to be good friends, and I think we should get to know her parents as well.
As Joan is exploring this conversation, Dan is getting lost. He has no idea what the budget at the university has to do with their daughter’s soccer game and their need to have a friendship with the Johnsons.²
Hilarious? Most certainly. But in the moment, maybe not always so funny. So what’s a person to do?
The first and greatest commandment is to love the Lord your God with all of our soul, heart, mind. The second is to love your neighbor as yourself. (See Matthew 22:37-38.)
According to 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7 (LB):
Love is very patient and kind, never jealous or envious, never boastful or proud, never haughty or selfish or rude. Love does not demand its own way. It is not irritable or touchy. It does not hold grudges and will hardly even notice when others do it wrong. It is never glad about injustice, but rejoices whenever truth wins out. If you love someone, you will be loyal to him no matter what the cost. You will always believe in him, always expect the best of him, and always stand your ground in defending him.
So even when your loved one seems to be living in a world far different from yours or living on a offbeat plane of reality, maybe the best thing to do would be to jump in their shoes and see life through their eyes…and love them. They might just do the same for you. You’ll never know what could happen—even if it is seeing the clouds in a whole new way. One you could hardly ever imagine!
Because He loves us,
Kimberly
Kimberly is the author of the children’s book Mr. Zip and The Capital Z.
Watch the book trailer here.
